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vollmann1969  Send MessageFollowActivity
1617 Points / Joined 19 Jan 2013 / UK / The Wild West

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MemberItem Review/Comment
vollmann1969
11th Sep 2021		TV
The Mersey Pirate (1979)		Review
Saturday morning Granada kids TV programme which ran for one season (although it seemed much longer!) when Tiswas were on their 1979 summer holidays.

Featuring Duggie Brown (Lynne Perrie's brother) Uber-gag-meister Frank Carson and former Cavern Club DJ, professional scouser Billy Butler.

Set aboard a boat on The Mersey, featuring a dockside audience and guests interviewed out on deck, it became the only televison programme, apart from the cricket, to be regularly called off due to inclement weather.

ANNOUNCER: There will be no Mersey Pirate today because it's raining.
KIDS WATCHING AT HOME:Yesss!! ... Brilliant!!!

It was rubbish to be honest, despite the inclusion of Carson. It felt as if the producers and crew were trying to manufacture a Tiswas-like anarchic madness within the staid confines of a format which wasn't that far off from resembling BBC's Multi-Coloured Swap Shop.

Then again almost anything having to stand in for Chris Tarrant and Sally James would have seemed pale at the time.

The format was repeated by Granada the following summer (sans Duggie B and shipping vessel) with the Billy Boyle fronted 'Fun Factory' (verification needed .. especially on the 'fun'.)
This effort not only introduced us to idiot cockney DJ Gary Crowley, but was the first ever television show to feature the artistic talents of a young Jeremy Beadle.

Enough said I think.

8 people found this review helpful.   ✔︎ Helpful Review?

vollmann1969
8th Jun 2015		TV
The A-Team (1983 - 1987)		A plot synopsis of every single episode:

1. Young woman with old/infirm father/uncle/brother are in trouble with some hoods / mafia types.

2. Said young woman visits backstreet Chinese laundry to meet a badly made up Faceman in his guise as top A Team contact and top oriental stereotype Mr. Wong ... ‘You just hiled da A Team’ etc. (they’d never get away with it these days.)

3. The A Team prepare for their mission ... but wait, they’ve first got to spring Howlin’ Mad Murdoch from the mental hospital ... hang on, now BA ‘aint getting on no plane sucka’ (However did he get to and from Vietnam I wonder?) Never mind, knock him out with a syringe in the neck. He’ll never ever realise or complain, despite waking up in a different van / time zone / country every time.

4. The A Team get into a shoot out with the hoods / mafia types and get trapped in a garage. Using some rusty scaffolding poles, gaffa tape, and an old bike (and with a full TIG Welding Unit which seems to have miraculously materialised from somewhere) they construct some sort of corrugated iron tank which fires 81mm mortar shells from an old asbestos downpipe (Were the HSE ever informed?)

5. With said tank they manage to blow up the hoods / mafia types entire base, knocking it off a cliff, into a volcano and then into a shark infested ocean. The hoods / mafia types come out shaking their heads and brushing the dust from their linen suits ... not a scratch on any of them.

6. Old Hannibal sparks up a cigar ‘ I love it when a plan comes together’ etc. Then Decker turns up late again, just as the A Team have made their escape ... What was it with Decker, he ballsed it up ever week for five bloody years, yet he never once got a telling off from his superiors ... If he worked for the Local Council instead of the Pentagon, he would have been down the road after six months ...

7. The End. Repeat as above the following Saturday.

vollmann1969
14th May 2015		TV
Tiswas (1974 - 1982)		Much as I am an admirer of public service broadcasting and the landmark programmes the BBC have produced over the years, when it came to Saturday mornings, Auntie Beeb was beaten hands down by this bunch of new wave ne’er do wells. These boys from Birmingham were anarchic, spontaneous, not to mention hilariously funny. (And Sally James was hotter than a Digbeth Vindaloo)

As far as I was concerned, Tiswas was punk rock. It encapsulated the times, the culture, the riots, and the mindless directionless energy then prevalent in a ten year old me. Swap Shop and Noel Edmonds never stood a chance.



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TV added by vollmann1969  11th Sep 2021:

The Mersey Pirate (1979)

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